Verse 11: Winter Excitement and Going Steady
The next morning all four had breakfast and then Bobby and Trish headed to church. After the Mass they went out for a walk and they spoke about Jim and Maureen’s wedding plans. “Glad fer Jim and Maureen dat dere getting married in t’ree months. Hopefully Maureen’ll ask ya t’ be ha maid o’ honor.” “She honestly has not spoken much to me about it, even though we live in the same house. I hope that she does. But he said that he might ask Peter to be the best man, since he knows him longer. From high school.” “I kin understand dat. Jim ‘n’ I became frinds at City College. He knows Peter a lot longer, so I unnastand. As long as dey invite both of us, I’ll be happy.”
During the rest of September Bobby and Trish saw more of each other. He was also accepted into the Corona Community Ambulance Corps and got to ride as a basic life support assistant. He had applied to the nursing program to the Hunter-Bellevue School of Nursing and was accepted. Corona and East Elmhurst are a bit rougher than Queensboro Hill and he got exposed to several victims of violence, more than he ever saw on the Hill. Hunter College is part of the CUNY system and he was a city resident, he would pay very little, except for books. The classes were during the week, so all Bobby had to do was hop the #6 train to Park Avenue and 23rd Street and walk to Bellevue. But even with all of this, Bobby still had time for Trish, like he had promised.
Jim and Maureen got married on Saturday, December 13th at a small church in Litchfield, Connecticut. It turns out that some of his distant relatives live in Torrington which is not too far away. Trish was the maid of honor and Peter was the best man. With Trish being in the wedding party, Bobby did get to sit with the bridal party at the small reception at a restaurant. Bobby and Trish left around 9 :30 for the 2 hour ride home to Queens.
During the following week Trish, with the help of Mr. McGrath, applied for a student visa. Since she also secretarial skills she was also hoping for a work visa. The next stop was to apply to a university. She asked Bobby and he suggested Queens College, which is part of the CUNY system like City is. He also suggested St. John’s. “My cousin Bill went dere ‘n’ he kinda liked it. “N’ dere's a lodge numba o’ foreign students.” Trish wanted to be a teacher so maybe St. John’s with its School of Education would be a good choice. Or Hunter College on Park Avenue.
The following weekend they went to Hell’s Kitchen to check out some plays at the Irish Arts Centre on 51st Street near 11th Avenue. They enjoyed a set of one act plays, one titled The Flats about the Troubles in Northern Ireland. Trish told him that it is pretty bad in the province. After the show they walked to Times Square to get the subway to Main Street. She would stay for dinner at Bob’s house, and his dad let them decorate the Christmas tree in the living room. After dinner they watched Masterpiece Theater’s Upstairs Downstairs on channel 13.
They exchanged gifts with each other and with Bobby’s parents on Christmas Eve. Bobby got a nice Irish wool newsman’s cap from Trish and he gave her two items: a New York Yankees tee shirt and a book – Centennial by James Michener. “Da book is on da Times’ Best Sella List, and da t-shirt’ll go well with yer Yankees cap. Are ya also lookin’ forward t’ da 1976 season as much as I am?” “Yes I am,” she replied. Later on they went up to St. Ann’s Church for the Midnight Mass.
During the Christmas holidays over the last weekend of the year they went into Manhattan to meet up with other City College alumni at a restaurant near Central Park. After dinner they walked to Central Park South by 6th Avenue and got into an enclosed Hansom cab. During the ride through the Park Bobby pulled out his Monsignor McClancy senior ring and showed it to Trish. He said that as a sign of commitment, a lady would wear it. After he asked her and she said yes, he gave it to her and it somehow fit on the middle finger of her left hand. They kissed a bit and held hands. Trish said that she does not have a high school ring since that is not a custom in Ireland. “Dat’s okay, Love. I have you.” After the ride they walked to F. A. O. Schwartz to check out the toys and other items. Trish liked the doll collections, especially the Madame Alexander ones. “Da Madame Alexander dolls’re made right here in da city ‘n’ dey become collectors’ items pretty quickly.”
Trish had noticed that Bobby was often a bit uneasy when the 4 of them were together. While they were walking to the subway she asked him, “How long have you and Jim been friends?” “Fer ‘bout 5 years. We was classmates at one course at City College.” We ‘riginally didn’t like it here in New York so we had somet’ing in common. But after I wen’ inta dee Army I got ta like big cities and I’m not da same person in 1975 dat I was in 1971. I wasn’t crazy ‘bout Georgia but I couldn’t quit wid’out getting’ inta trouble. And then I wasn’t happy dat he didn’t even send my mom or me a card when my gran’fatha died a few months ago. He complained t’ me dat Southen ‘n’ Eastern Europeans are getting’ priority wit’ visas ova Irish immigrants. But as Mr. McGrath tol’ us, it’s foist come foist served since 1965. That’s why we acted as soon as we could. I also didn’t like when he grouped all Italian immigrants inta one bad group. My two gran’mothas are still alive ‘n’ dey certainly ain’t like dat.” “To be honest, I did not like his bad mouthing New York and the people who live there. I love you, and your parents and grandmother are wonderful.” "‘N’ we didden grow up da same. My mom ‘n’ dad were a lot stricta dan his were. I hadda ask permission t’ do almost anyt’in’ when I was ‘n school. Dey wouldn’t even lemme ‘ave a cah and it was a bit stiflin’ while in school. Dee Army helped me grow up. Maybe I got a bit envious of ‘im.” They kept walking and then kissed each other before they entered the 5th Avenue subway station by 53rd Street.
Verse 12: Starting School Again and “Yes”
On the day after New Year’s in 1976 Mrs. DiSimone got a call from Jeanne Dillon. She and her husband wanted to go out to dinner with Trish and Bobby. They exchanged Christmas cards with them a couple of weeks before and now wanted to do something special for them. When Bobby came home from work his mom told him who called and that he should call her back. He went upstairs to his room where his own phone was and called Jeanne back. She asked if he and Trish would like to join her husband and her over the weekend at a nice Manhattan restaurant. Bobby said of course. Jeanne also called Trish and told her of the plans. Trish was interested so on Saturday afternoon she and Bobby met in Bayside to head into the city to meet Jeanne and her husband at the Sea Fare of the Aegean on West 56th Street. “Trish, I t’ink dat tis time since we’re dressed a bit formally, we’ll drive inta Manhattan and park in a g’rage.” Bobby had on his best suit and Trish had a nice dress with high heels – torture to walk in. They headed down the LIE to the Midtown Tunnel and soon were heading west to 6th Avenue and uptown to 56th Street where they turned east and into a garage to park the truck. Once they parked the truck they walked down the block to the Sea Fare. When they went inside Jeanne and her husband were waiting for them in the foyer. Soon the hostess brought them to a table and they sat down. Jeanne opened the conversation by saying, “Michael, this is Bobby DiSimone, who pulled Eleanor out of the Reservoir. And this is his lovely lady friend Patricia Flaherty.” Both Bobby and Pat said that they were pleased to meet Michael. “I saw both of you on News 11 the day after the rescue. It must have taken some bravery to risk your life,” he said to both Bobby and Pat. “I just did what I t’ought was right. I t’ink dat dee Army did instill an ability t’ act in an ‘mergency. So I just remembe’d what I learned ‘n basic trainin’”. “I think that he is a modest but brave young man,” Pat said. They noticed the large high school ring on her middle finger and then she said to Michael and Jeanne, “That’s Bobby’s ring from McClancy High School. We are now going steady, as you say here.” Soon they ordered drinks: JD-7 for Bobby, white wine for Pat, and cocktails for the Dillon’s. They then asked Bobby what his plans are. They were even more impressed when he told them that he was starting nursing school at the Hunter Bellevue School of Nursing in a few weeks. After a nice dinner the Dillon’s walked Bobby and Pat to the garage and said that they would like to get together will them in the future. Bobby and Pat went into the garage and retrieved the truck and headed towards the Queensboro Bridge and then the Grand Central Parkway and to Bayside. Once at 214th Place, he walked her into the house and they relaxed for a few minutes. After Trish kicked off her shoes, they went into the bedroom for intimacy.
The spring semester at Hunter Bellevue started on Monday the 26th and Bobby had to go after work to East 25th Street. He was a bit apprehensive but he knew that he was part of the only 40% accepted. He would be taking pre-requisites for his second bachelor’s degree, such as psychology. This semester he opted for 9 credits, to see if it will work out. Apparently it did, because he finished the spring semester on time with nine credits under his belt and had signed up for each of the summer sessions. At the same time Trish started at the Hunter College School of Education, and also got a job as a legal secretary at a law firm on Park Avenue near Bobby’s office. Naturally they tried to see each other at lunch time once in a while but usually had classes after work so the lunch break often meant study time for each of them.
On February 21st Bobby and Trish went into Manhattan again to go to see the Chieftains at the City Center over on West 55th Street. After the performance and dinner at a nice restaurant, they walked over to Central Park and again got into a Hansom Cab and rode through Central Park. Of course, they were holding hands and snuggling. Bobby soon asked Trish if he can marry her and she said “Yes.” He was ecstatic and kissed her a bit more. After the ride they walked down to 5th and 42nd Street to get the subway to Bobby’s house to break the news to his parents. They had been hoping that they would tie the knot eventually since they thought that Trish was perfect for him. Bobby told his mom and dad to meet their future daughter in law. Both Mr. and Mrs. DiSimone were on cloud 9. The next day Trish called her parents in Ireland and told them the good news. She was not certain of the wedding day but said that it would be in 7 or 8 months. Both Mr. and Mrs. Flaherty were also on cloud 9.
Verse 13: The Knot Would be Tied
Their wedding would be in September at Sacred Heart Church in Bayside since Trish was still living with Jim’s parents. They also had to visit the rectory there to make arrangements with the priest. The ideal day would be September 18th. Summer is almost over and the weather should be mild. When they visited the rectory the priest was receptive and happy for them. He told them that they had to go to Pre-Cana meetings at a parish somewhere in the Brooklyn Diocese. In June when they were both finished with the spring semester they were able to book the meetings at St. Gregory’s Church in Bellerose. It was a series of two sessions, with married people instructing how a good marriage lasts and how to survive financially – like if both spouses are working, you should bank one check.
Once baseball season started they found time to go to some ball games. They took in the Mets on the 4th of July in the second game of a double header which they lost to the Cubs 4-2. And with 1976 being the country’s 200th birthday, they were able to see several of the tall ships at the South Street Seaport and in the Hudson River on the next day. They also went to Yankee Stadium on August 22nd to see the Yankees lose to the Angels 11-8. Trish had watched Bobby and his dad keep score at games so by the end of the 1976 season she had also learned the art.
In August Bobby found a 3 room apartment in Queensboro Hill not far from his parents’ home that he and Trish would move into when they were finally married. Luckily he did not have to buy an engagement ring since his mom gave him the one that she inherited when her grandmother passed away several years ago. They did go to a jeweler in Flushing to check out wedding rings. “Let’s get Claddagh rings for each of us,” she said. “Whatsa Claddagh ring?,” he asked. Trish showed him one in the display case and he said definitely. Trish and Bobby both went to a nail salon by Booth Memorial to get manicures and pedicures. Trish had never used nail polish before but this time she opted for a bright pink for both her fingernails and her toenails. “Very preddy. How come ya never did it before” he said. “I never got around to it,” she replied.
Now they both had to prepare the guest list and contact everyone. Who was going to be in the wedding party? How large will it be? Where is the reception going to be? With Trish’s parents still in Ireland the burden fell on Trish, Bobby, and his parents. It turns out that Cousin Bill did not want to be in the wedding party since he did not have a steady girlfriend at the time. Bobby asked his cousin Phil to be best man and he said yes. Maureen Boyle Branigan agreed to be maid of honor. With no siblings, Bobby had to ask family or friends to be ushers. Trish was not certain if her siblings were going to come to New York, or even if her parents could. She called them and learned that they would be coming over, as would her brother and sister. Both siblings would be in the party as a bridesmaid and usher. Even though neither of them had a large circle of friends, Jim agreed to be an usher as did another one of Bobby’s cousins. Another cousin agreed to be a bridesmaid, and her 6-year old son would be the ring bearer. Over the next couple of months the ladies got fitted for gowns and dresses and the guys measured for morning coats. Bobby wanted to look different than most other grooms. He had become an avid fan of the Marx Brothers so looking like Groucho suited him.
Responses came back and only one of Bobby’s coworkers said that he could come. Louie seemed to be unattached but wrote a lady’s name on the response card to say that he was bringing a guest without consulting Bobby or Trish. Bobby was not too pleased but did not want to make waves in the department. He had invited his immediate coworkers and if he excluded this guy it could look bad.
Yet both Bobby and Trish found time to take classes during the summer sessions – one per session. Even in the fall with the wedding, they signed up for 6 credits each. The honeymoon will be in December during the Christmas recess.
On September 18th, 1976 Mr. Flaherty walked Trish down the aisle at Sacred Heart Church to a waiting and a bit edgy Bobby. Father said the prayers and they exchanged their rings and promised to be true to each other and love and honor each other all the days of their lives. There was a reception line at the back of the church and then everyone piled out onto 38th Avenue for photos. The reception was at Leonard’s of Great Neck, a few miles east on Northern Boulevard. Bobby had noticed that his coworker and date were not in the reception line. Was he a no show? When they got to Leonard’s there were the mandatory photo shoots with the wedding party and with Trish’s and Bobby’s family. Then they all went into the main room for some celebrating. Bobby and Trish both noticed that Louie and his date were not at their assigned table.
Trish had a dance with her dad, and also with Mr. DiSimone. Bobby had a dance with his mom and then with Mrs. Flaherty. For their first dance as husband and wife, they chose As Time Goes By. Bobby had gotten interested in movies again thanks to Trish and loved the films of Humphrey Bogart. During the reception they hugged each other and mingled with the family and friends. About 4 pm Louie and his date arrived at the reception to a very annoyed Bobby and Trish. They showed them over to their table and introduced them to the guests there – friends of Bobby’s from City College as well as the Dillon’s. They too were not happy with what Louie had done. But like they said, what can you do. The reception was over at 5 pm and then Bobby and Trish, along with the parents and Trish’s siblings, gathered up the gifts to take to the DiSimone house. Trish asked Bobby what Louie gave them and he said that he could not find anything. So it turns out that he not only invited his own guest, but neither of them bothered to come to the church or give even a wedding card! Both Trish and Bobby were quite pissed. But that was no reason to do anything rash. Soon Bobby and Trish and family members got into cars and headed to the DiSimone house. Once there it was time for Trish to get out of her wedding dress and into something comfortable, and for Bobby to put on something casual. He and his mom helped Trish get the dress off and soon Trish was topless, in front of both of them. But hey, they were married! Soon they were in comfortable clothes and relaxed for a little while. They would be spending the night in a hotel in Manhattan and come home to their apartment on Sunday. After Trish’s family left to go to their hotel by Kennedy Airport, Bobby and Trish got into Bobby’s truck and headed into Manhattan. They would be spending the night at a hotel in the West 30’s near 5th Avenue. Once there they got intimate for the first time legally with no worries about parents saying anything to them.
The next morning after breakfast they went to church at Holy Innocents and then walked to Herald Square and took photos in the square and looked at what was in the windows at Macy’s. At around noon they checked out, picked up Bobby’s truck and headed to the Midtown Tunnel and to their new home. It was in a two family row house just east of Main Street on 58th Road. The land lord had the garage that was accessed through an alley so Bobby had to park on the street, just like he did when he lived on Lawrence Street. “Let’s watch da ballgame,” Bobby said. The Mets were playing the Pirates and won 7-6. They had bought blank score books a few months ago at a sporting goods store and each kept score in the living room. Trish was becoming more Americanized.
Verse 14: Work, School, Belated Honeymoon, and Citizenship
The next morning they grabbed the Q-44 bus to the subway and then to Grand Central and their jobs. When Bobby got to his office he saw Louie and snubbed him. He told one of his coworkers about the wedding and also what Louie did to Trish and him. She was not too happy with him, either. But both of them agreed that it is better not to say anything.
After work they each went to their classes at Hunter. In the age before cellphones they would each take the subway and bus home and meet at the apartment on class nights. If neither of them had classes, Trish would walk to the lobby at 200 Park and meet Bobby and they would walk to the #7 train and head home. They would be studying even while standing up in the subway car. Once married they did not visit friends or relatives as often but whenever they did go out, either to a restaurant or to someone’s house, they always took their books to study. On numerous occasions Bobby had to tell the wait staff that both he and his wife are in college and every second counts. “We both work full time so we need t’ study ev’ry chance we get.”
Trish also worked on becoming a citizen, and she since was married to Bobby she was able to get a green card with little trouble in 1976. Also, Mr. McGrath helped with several issues. She had told Bobby the year before that she wanted to live in the United States. Yes, she really did love him and it was not just for legal status. And even though she was married, Trish had opted to keep her maiden name after marrying Bobby since it would be easier with respect to immigration issues.
The honeymoon was three months later, during the winter recess. They left Kennedy Airport on Boxing Day for Aruba, arriving in the late morning. Soon they checked into the Aruba Concorde and went to their room. After their luggage arrived they undressed and got intimate. Naturally they both said how much they loved each other while under the sheets. When the love making was over they went into the bathroom and showered together. After they got dressed it was time to visit the casino downstairs since Bobby’s aunt, a travel agent, gave provided them with $50 in free chips. After a nice lunch they walked into the casino bar area. “Would ja like ‘n Amstel beer, Love? I’m havin’ one.” “Sure, why not. Bobby, let’s go to the black jack table.” The dealer dealt them the ten of spades and the 9 of hearts. “Let’s hold at 19”, Trish suggested. And it was a good move since the dealer only had 18, and the other bettor a 17. They played one more round before they decided to leave and go for a walk along Hotel Row. The next day it was the beach and another photo op. They also walked along the path in Hotel Row to check out one of the gift shops. “How ‘bout some Wedgwood fer Mom ‘n’ Dad? ‘N’ some Waterford Crystal fer us?” Trish picked a Portland blue vase for the parents and a Waterford cookie jar for themselves.” “The biscuit barrel is for us,” she told Bobby. After they paid for their wares they walked back to their hotel and up to their room. Since it was still light out, they went back to the beach for some more dips into the Caribbean and some more photos. In the evening they went down to the hotel restaurant for some nice Indonesian cuisine and a trip to the casino. This time they tried the slot machines first, and after losing $10, went back to the blackjack table and broke even before calling it a night. They then walked along Hotel Row again before returned to their room and turning in for the night. The next day was the 27th and after breakfast took a bus to Oranjestad to visit some of the shops and walk around to take photos. Wilhelmina Park offered a chance to walk around some paths, and for Trish to do some modern dance posing. There were also the statues of the late Queen and of Anne Frank to photograph and admire. After that they headed to the Museo Historico Aruba to check out the exhibits and to take more photos and then walk to the Beth Israel Synagogue to admire its impressive architecture. When it was lunch time Trish suggested that they have the main meal now and a small one at dinner time. “Lunch is usually cheaper than dinner and since we are here, let’s check out one of the nicer ones.” After she looked at the guidebook that was in Bobby’s backpack, she saw a nice Argentine grille on Wilhelminastratt that she said they should check out. “This Argentine restaurant looks interesting. Let’s go there.” Once the hostess showed theme to a table and gave them their menus for them to pour over. “Let’s have the min-grill for two. Everything’s there, including the wine.” When the waiter came to take their order Bobby told him, “We wid like t’ orda two cream o’ pumpkin soups, ‘n’ beef tendaloin and ribs. Also fried plantains ‘n’ corn on da cob. ‘N’ a carafe of red wine.” They enjoyed their meal and then went for another walk around the city, stopping in a store to treat themselves to a book about Aruba, and another roll of film. Then it was back to the hotel to rest and get intimate. The next day it was a ride on a glass bottom boat, and they were able to see some of the marine life and also a scuttled German freighter from 1940. In the afternoon they went back to the beach to go into the water and walk along the shore for some exercise and to hold hands. On the 29th they packed up and got a cab to the airport to fly back to New York. When they landed Bobby’s parents were there to pick them up and drive them home. They invited inside for coffee and gave them some gifts – a couple of pieces of Wedgwood and a bottle of Dutch chocolate liqueur. “We had a great time, the beach was beautiful and the food in the restaurants was phenomenal. Bobby had plenty of photo opportunities and will make copies of any pictures that you want,” Trish said.
Citizenship takes 3 years and it would be 1979 before she could apply. But in the meantime she had several years to get her bachelor's degree in education, and citizenship would come before the diploma. Nine credits per semester and 6 during the summer, plus 3 during the winter session. A rough schedule for Trish, and Bobby also had a similar schedule at Bellevue. Trish did become a US citizen in 1979 and naturally Bobby was there with his trusty camera to record the event. Trish graduated from Hunter College in the spring of 1982 with a bachelor of arts degree in childhood education. Bobby graduated with his bachelor of science in nursing at the same time. It took both of them 120 credit hours and lots of hard work over 6 years.
Epilogue
Once they both graduated it was time to find their chosen careers. Trish looked for work at an elementary school, maybe on Long Island. Bobby was interested in working in an emergency room. After many hours of contacting school districts and hospitals, Trish found a job as an elementary school teacher at the Abbey Lane School in Levittown. Bobby was soon employed as an emergency room nurse at the Nassau County Medical Center in East Meadow. Other than their honeymoon in December 1976 when they went to Aruba, they did not go on any long trips and were frugal about eating out. As they were both avid baseball fans now, they would go maybe four times a year at most. As much as they both loved the theater, a trip to Broadway was way too expensive so they went to the theater at Adelphi or St. John’s Universities. They decided to buy a house in Levittown on Penny Lane to minimize commuting expenses. Bobby had retired his mini-pickup truck in 1979 and had bought a new 1979 Toyota Corolla. Trish had learned to drive and in 1982 she got herself a used 1979 Volkswagen Golf. Bobby joined the U.S. Army reserves as a nurse, receiving a commission as a first lieutenant and also joined the Levittown Fire Department at their station on Gardiners Lane. Trish was able to join the Ancient Order of Hibernians in Massapequa. Unfortunately, since Bobby is only Irish by marriage, he could not join but was able to go to functions as her guest.
In May of 1988 Trish told Bobby that she missed her period and then a few days later was running to the bathroom to heave. Yes, she was pregnant after over 12 years of marriage! The new baby would arrive in January 1989. But since Trish turned 36 years old in early 1988, in July she visited the obstetrics department at Nassau Medical Center for a chorionic villus sampling (CVS) exam. A few days later she got the news that there were no birth defects and that they will be having a girl. Naturally they spread the news to their families and Trish’s friends. Bobby did not say anything because he did not want to draw attention to himself and was a bit superstitious about things going wrong when he told everyone about something. So it was not until the last trimester that some of the other members of his fire house or his coworkers knew that a baby was coming in early 1989. “Bobby, we know that your wife is pregnant,” a fellow firefighter told him. “But I don’ wanna jinx it by talkin’ bout it t’ ev’ryone,” he responded to Vince. It was the same at the medical center. But once they knew they wished Trish and him the best.
Their new baby girl, Eileen Patricia DiSimone, was born on January 14th, 1989 at Nassau University Medical Center, by a C-section. Bobby was able to assist the obstetrician in delivering his daughter. And since Trish was under anesthesia from her shoulders down, Bobby was the first to hold their new baby. Five days later Trish and Eileen came home to the house on Penny Lane and it was a new chapter for all three of them. A lot did happen since that fateful evening in August 1975.